blog avatar2016-10-05

I’m going to tell you a tale, a legend if you will, of a secret history uncovered. On ebay of all places. but it was on the Electronic Bay that our story begins.

For you see, I was exploring the ebays one night, seeking out exotic wares of years past. Specifically, I was, on this night, searching for Lazer Tag paraphernalia, as I often do.

You, my dear reader, may not have been there to witness this, but in the mid 80’s a company called Worlds of Wonder (who brought us Teddy Ruxpin) attempted to create a home Lazer Tag system and to make a sport of it.

It was creatively called: Lazer Tag, and it was classy as fuck.

On this visit to the electronic bay, I was looking for a Lazer Tag helmet, for they are hella dope, and thus it was that Foley and I stumbled across a mystery that immediately consumed our minds. For you see, we found a very special helmet.

This helmet looked like any other Lazer Tag helmet at first glance. There was but one small difference, almost indiscernible to the untrained eye. However, I, your humble story teller, am a connoisseur of the Lazer Tags. My keen eyes spotted the difference immediately, though it’s full import had not yet made itself known to me.

It seems that the previous owner of this helmet had at one time had access to an old school label maker, the kind that punched letters into hard plastic tape.

This individual labelled their helmet, forever declaring it the property of the greatest hero of the Lazer Tag age.

This helmet belongs to:


The label is so perfectly placed that you would think it was meant to be there, and surely, though not intended by the manufacturer, that name was meant to be there in the eyes of the Universe at large.


The questions are many:


Why did they choose that name for a game whose setting is entirely devoid of dragons, or any other fantasy creatures?

Was DRAGONSBANE a man? a woman? a god? all of the above? none?

Was DRAGONSBANE the greatest Lazer Tag champion of all time?

Why did they let their mantle, their helm of power, fall into the hands of an ebay reseller?

Has DRAGONSBANE passed on? ascended?

Do the sigils that spell out DRAGONSBANE still have power?

Where are DRAGONSBANE‘s Lazers?

Does DRAGONSBANE battle on without their helmet?

Obviously Foley and I became immediately obsessed with DRAGONSBANE.

Were there more artifacts of DRAGONSBANE?

I messaged the eBay seller to see, but I was cool about it, didn’t want to tip our hand, so I just asked if they had any more Lazer tag stuff, hoping that perhaps they had DRAGONSBANE‘s guns.

They did not.

However, they did have a vest. We assume it to be DRAGONSBANE‘s.

Needless to say, I immediately bought both the helmet and the vest. The seller does not ship to Canada, so I had to enlist the help of a friend in Seattle to acquire these treasures.

And then, on September the 22nd…

The legend of DRAGONSBANE is just beginning…